I was once upon a time a fellow of the cult called Mumbai or Bombay ... whichever suits your taste - for I don't care as the city is just as great with/without that name change! I though must be politically correct here and say that I like Mumbai better ;) ... I am no more the same fellow as I am no more dreaming what Mumbai dreams or what an average young fella in Mumbai is dreaming ... I don't have any starry eyed illusions of life that you have when you are on the right side of the age of 25 ... or those lovely can-do moments where you discover a new you!
I am another 'mature' probably youngish man who has now experienced struggle in life, come out battered and bruised, yet alive ... drifted away from Mumbai (and nation) and instead of becoming even more selfish (which every careerist in Mumbai is!), grew (much to my astonishment) a hardline nationalist ... and in this transition, probably lost forever the innocence that the struggle instills in you while you are at it.
I miss myself sometimes... probably a lotta times when I am reflecting alone. I think and shudder to realise that my '18' was a decade ago! I miss the fact that no more can I just drop out of house careless of what I am wearing and jump the compound wall of my building (it almost looks like an olympic feat to me now!) and go to play cricket in the next gully or just run down a kilometer at break neck speed to the nearest friend's house or playground...no more can I just shout to my friend from below his 'balcony' and expect that he will shout back half eating his poha and obviously appear shirtless in his favourite part of the house to let me know that he is coming down ASAP... no more can I dart across from one part of the city in the local train in 2 hours to the other part completely alien to me ... just to get a glimpse of a friend leaving city or to a date away from the family's (and 'wellwisher's) prying eyes ...I am grown up now.. and pretty sad for that last detail ... a transition you look up to when you are young and a transition you hate to accept when you achieve it finally. You imagine the freedom that maturity and grownup-ness brings and pretty much hate that very thing when you are actually on your own in the end!
When I travel to Mumbai now, I hardly feel that I can relate to the mall-hopping culture or then the crazy train-cramming (even though I used to achieve this feat myself when I was there!). The average Mumbaikar's selfish dream actually looks selfish from this distant land and yet, you strive to achieve it religiously when you are there and doing that. What am I blabbering right? Just some rumblings that my mind is completely filled up with ... just clearing some conundrum ... nothing more ... better still and probably truly, boring those who care to read this blog..
But, I do think that Mumbai is dreaming on its own ... for better streets, better air, clean water, clear skies (by this I mean freedom from the towering concretes!) and yes, an important thing called respect for the life of an average and selfish Mumbaikar and his dreams and aspirations ... will we ever have 'human' elected members of state legislative assembly who will think about letting an average Mumbaikar lead a life that he/she wants without making him/her go through this circus of being a Mumbaikar and put his/her life on the line everyday for as simple a task as travelling from his place of residence to his work or whatever thing he/she wishes to do (even as trivial as dating someone!)? Mumbai is dreaming pink (I mean with rose-tinted glasses here before all those alternative meanings of pink are applied) for itself and its fellow dreamers ... I only wish that these pink dreams are fulfilled...amen!
